Why I need to stop watching cooking shows...

So I'm minding my own business, chewing on vegetables, avoiding starches, doing great...then we watch Kitchen Nightmares, I get a look at a big bowl of french fries and now it's all I can think about. I stayed strong for dinner, even though I was thisclose to sending J out for burgers and fries...but I didn't. I make turkey bratwurst again and roasted kale (Thanks Laura!). It really was delicious. Since Monday is weigh in day, I may just hold out and see what the numbers say and if I'm still thinking of fries on Monday afternoon, I'll grab an order for lunch. There are several places that sell sweet potato fries, so maybe I'll even do that just to satisfy the urge.

I tell you though, the Cooking Channel and Food Network are evil for dieting. Between the delicious food being cooked, the restuarants with all the fabulous dishes and all the freaking cupcake/cake challenges on lately, I turn it off a lot. Speaking of, what is with all the cupcake/cake challenges lately? I mean, someone is baking a huge cake every time I turn on the TV.

Today was a day that I felt really good. When I got dressed, there was a big difference in how my clothes fit and how I look and it was nice to see. Even J noticed and mentioned it and that felt great too. I took some pictures before I started this and was thinking today that maybe I'll do some after pictures at each 20 lbs. Just something to keep me motivated. Hope everyone is having a great weekend.

Mind Body Balance

Today I was thinking about this whole plan for my body changes and realized that as far as blogging about bringing sexy back, there are other things I've been doing to take care of myself mentally and emotionally. I think it's important that I spend time reflecting on more than just the physical changes I've been working on. About 2 months ago (kiddo was between 6 and 7 months), I was in a really bad place emotionally. I was really struggling to keep it together every day. I knew that it was probably a little bit of post partum depression and that if I didn't address it, things could easily get worse. Thankfully I've been in and out of counseling for the last 10 years and I don't have any issues with going where I need to go in order to get help. I called up 2 of my friends that have personally coached me through the years, started taking time out for myself each day and made an appointment with a counselor. I absolutely believe that when I take even the smallest amount of action in order to right myself, that I'm met more than halfway by my Higher Power. Just making those phone calls and going to that first appointment completely changed the way that I felt. I've continued the counseling and I've continued to speak to my friends openly about how I'm feeling on a regular basis and I can say that I'm feeling more like myself today than I have in the last 9 months.

I have struggled with body image and my weight most of my life. I know from my past experience in getting healthy that when I make transformation all about my appearance, it never works for me. Not only that, but it can also make my mental state pretty scary as well. This time, I just ignored the mirror and focused on the inside first. I knew that if I took care of myself emotionally and spiritually, that the physical aspect would be a piece of cake. I haven't discussed that here because originally this was about my getting active again and paying better attention to my food intake. However, I couldn't get here without first addressing the dark place I was living in a couple of months ago. As I was leaving my counseling appointment today it occurred to me that I was leaving out an important part of the journey by not talking about this stuff. I realized that this blog could seem superficial and all about trying to get back into my size 8 jeans, but it's really not. It's really about me trying to reclaim some of myself after having a baby, and there is a balance that I am keeping in my sights. There are 3 sides to bringing sexy back, and they are all equally important.

Bring on the pizza!

Met my goal for last week, so now I am going to treat myself to a little Campisis at some point this week. My order: small pepperoni and italian sausage pizza with a salad. Can't wait! I'm home with the Monkey today because J is sick, so I'll probably just plan on going later this week for lunch. Here's what is awesome about the 11 pounds I've already lost:


1. It puts me on the right side of 200, which really helps me when thinking about how much more I have to go. That's right, before today, I've been pushing the scale at over 200 lbs. I ain't skeered.

2. It's the most I've lost since I had the baby. I've gone back and forth with the same 5 lbs since he was born, so I feel like I'm finally making some progress, which feels good.

3. My measurements are also decreasing and I can actually see some difference in the mirror, not to mention in how my clothes are fitting.


I had a little oatmeal for breakfast yesterday and corn on the cob for dinner. Today is an "accelerate" day, so no starchy carbs. I'm really enjoying my standard breakfast of scrambled eggs (1 whole, 3 whites) and strawberries. It's pretty tasty and I rarely get hungry before lunch. I've actually even forgotten my mid-morning snack a few times and had my yogurt for dessert at lunch.


There is one other thing I've been doing that I keep forgetting to include here. I don't know if it's a total difference maker, but for scientific purposes, I should include all variables. I've been taking cinnamon and green tea supplements every day on a schedule that was outlined by Dr. Oz. Apparently cinnamon is a great blood sugar equalizer and helps you feel full longer. The schedule goes like this:

Morning: 2 cinnamon, 1 green tea

Noon: 2 cinnamon, 2 green tea

Dinner: 1 cinnamon, 1 green tea

It sucks that we have so much rain, I was thinking about taking the kiddo out for a walk. I will probably end up hitting the elliptical at the gym later tonight instead.

Love/Hate for Vegetables

Again, I wish I could've taken this picture with Gage. So funny. So officially I'm on 3 of the 2nd cycle and not much has changed. Well except for that thing on Friday where I ate a slice of cake. Oh and did I mention I ate a little potato salad too? But that wasn't a big deal, because it really was just a little nibble. ANYWAY, I did the shopping today and picked up a few things that I can incorporate into my menu planning for next week, mainly brown rice (for lunch) and oatmeal (for breakfast). I get a 1/2 cup serving of each at their respective meals every other day (starting tomorrow) and I have to get them in before 2p. Easy Peasy.

Now, on to the topic at hand. Vegetables. I have a long and complicated history with vegetables. Growing up, I hardly ever ate them. You had to really force me to eat any vegetables that weren't corn, potatoes or carrots. And carrots had to be raw, not cooked, and I had to be able to dip them in ranch. It's a long story, but basically, terrible about eating vegetables. When J and I met, he would make jokes about my inability to eat vegetables. I would eat a "salad" and it would really just be lettuce and dressing. Tomatoes were a big NO GO for me about 8 years ago. Luckily, J grew up eating EVERYTHING and slowly, I started trying more and more as well. I found that there were several things I had never even tried and by trying different cooking techiniques, I could usually find a way to make them tasty.

However, as tolerant as I have become, I do get tired of them quickly. On this diet I have been eating vegetables every day...and because I am still limited, I tend to eat the same 2 vegetables...broccoli and green beans....and now...I'm having a hard time choking either of those things down. I know that there a ton more green, non starchy vegetables out there, but as someone that had to be pushed into eating green stuff, I feel guarded and limited by both my lack of experience and knowledge in this genre. So I am asking...please recommend some of your go-to vegetables and vegetable dishes. I need to shake things up around here and get a little more adventurous. I don't want Gage to grow up with this limited idea on veggies. Thank goodness J is so open to whatever - I hope Gage has his mentality about trying new foods.

Gage and I took a 45 minute walk at the lake today and we had a pretty good time. Told you there would be cardio.

Shame...Delicious Shame

Ok. I totally gave in and had a slice of this amazing white cake with chocolate frosting someone brought to a potluck at work today. I put it off as long as I could and around 2p, I just couldn't help myself. It looked so good. And you know what? It WAS. Totally worth it. I behaved myself during the actual lunch, but I couldn't walk away from that cake.

I haven't really changed much, even though I'm in the 2nd cycle. After I post this I need to make the grocery list and I'm going to add in a few new things for next week. I'm still sticking to my "Monday Goal = Campisi's", so we'll see how that goes in a couple of days. If I don't get it this week, I'll just try again next week.

There will be some cardio this weekend. Oh yes, there will be cardio this weekend.

17 days. DONE.

So I finished the first cycle and to be honest, it hasn't been that tough. The first 3 days were a little rough, but after that, it's been all good. I don't even find myself craving snacks/sweets late in the afternoon, which has been a problem in the past. Tomorrow starts the "Activate" cycle of the diet - another 17 day cycle that lets me add back in some foods. To be honest, I'll probably add back in a little here and there - the option for lean red meat is nice - but for the most part, it may just be oatmeal in the morning. I'm going to start working out again, so if I find I need more carbs to sustain activity, I'll add back as necessary.

Now you ask, why did you post a picture of the Campisi's sign, Tara? Because I've finished the 1st cycle, lost 9 lbs and I'm considering a reward. I know that "they" say not to reward yourself with food, but the ONLY thing I want is a salad and small pizza from Campisi's. So you know what? If I weigh in next Monday and I've dropped another 2 lbs (my weekly goal)...I'm going for it. One cheat meal in 3 weeks won't kill the momentum. SO we'll find out on Monday if it's on.

Day 15 - 1st cycle almost done

See the progress button over there on the left? Today was another weigh in and another 3 pounds lost. I knew that it wouldn't continue to be 6 pounds every week, so I was pleasantly surprised that it was 3. There are 2 more days in this first 17 day cycle and then I get to add back lean cuts of red meat (can't believe I haven't had red meat in 15 days), some grains and legumes/beans. The rules are that I still have to eat my carbs before 2p and I have to alternate days - so one day will be based on this 1st cycle, then the next day is based on the new cycle menu.
My goal going forward is 1-2 pounds a week, and I'm hoping that if I keep up the healthy eating and start adding back some workouts, that won't be too tough. Based on that goal, I'll be feeling a lot more like myself by July and back to my favorite weight around October. I've committed to Muddy Buddy again this year with a friend of mine, so I need to start getting my butt in gear!

Bringing back....sexy hair

Weight comes off slowly...but you know what always makes me feel good about myself? A new haircut! My friend Amy G is working at a new salon in Carrollton - Indira Salon - and I went to visit her today for a new 'do. Yes. Yes that was a shameless plug for her. The salon just opened today and it's really nice. They do it up the Aveda way, which means stress relieving shampoos and hand massages...which are included! Please please please consider going and checking her out up there - and tell them that I sent you.

On to the eating - today was a little weird. I didn't plan my lunch well and I was pretty hungry by the time I got home. It threw me off a little and it's been hard not to go into the kitchen and make myself a peanut butter sandwich. The weekend is here, and I've planned better this time. There is enough good food in there to get me through lunch, so I should be able to get to the store and get stocked up again before I have to resort to anything sinister.

Hope everyone has a fabulous weekend!

Day 10 - Confessions

Ok, don't tell anyone, but I had a little cheat bite today. I couldn't help it...they were samples from a new bakery...and it was spice cake...and it was a teeny tiny bite, smaller than a doughnut hole....and it was delicious. Now my husband is eating Hooters wings in the office while I had Morningstar Chicken Patties for dinner (didn't want to cook). I think I deserved the tiny bite of spice cake for sitting here smelling those wings and not even licking one of them. So there. But still...don't tell anyone.
Things are still going well with the eating. The scale is still moving in the right direction and it really has not been hard to make good choices. Another weekend is headed our way and I'm not worried about it at all, so that's nice. I need to start making my grocery list tonight so that I can be ready to hit the store early on Saturday morning. A week from today I'll be able to add some grain carbs back into the mix and I'm looking forward to oatmeal! There are rules about it, but I don't care. Oatmeal!
Once I add the carbs back next week, CARDIO.

6 pounds!

Look to the left. 6 pounds. Awesome.

Successful Weekend

Wouldn't it have been great if I could've gotten Gage to pose for that pic? Well, I made it through my first weekend without so much as a bite of the free sample chocolate chip cookies they hand out at Albertsons. Crazy! Guess what I discovered tonight? Turkey Bratwurst! Delicious, filling dinner - maybe the best meal I've had since I started this...although the horseradish mustard is probably what really put it over the top. I cleaned the house for almost 3 hours today, so I'm counting that as my cardio. I worked up a sweat, for sure.
7 days down and tomorrow is the first official weight check. I've been watching all week and it's been going really well, so here's hoping for a "skinny" morning tomorrow. Hope everyone had a great weekend, now it's back to the grind!

Hungry at the Grocery Store...Day 6

Rule #1 of grocery shopping - do NOT go to the store hungry! Hello, we all know this. I totally messed that up this morning. I made sure that I had enough for breakfast today, but I didn't have a mid-morning snack. So by the time I went to the store, I was eyeballing the bakery section for free samples and trying to convince myself that a piece of pumpkin bread from Starbucks would be ok. Thankfully, the force was with me and I stayed strong. The munchkin and I finished the grocery shopping without any grazing or junk food and when I got home I had a "17 day diet" approved meal for lunch. Phew. Got a little rocky there toward the end though - I was pretty hungry. The rest of the day went as planned, afternoon snack: apple and dinner: turkey burger (no bun) and broccoli.
Day 6 (and my first weekend day) is done and it's getting easier all the time. I didn't even have any wild cravings or hunger attacks late in the evening...and I usually do. Got all of my water in, which was hard for me - I had to keep sitting down and reminding myself to have some water. Now that I have the food intake down and it's not making me feel zapped, I believe I will again try to add some cardio to the mix. I don't think I'm going to jump back to running just yet. The Monkey and I are going to take some long walks and then I'm going to hit the elliptical at the gym for a little while. Take it slower this time.
One more day until my first official weigh in. Stay strong!

Super Smell...and the Weekend

The thing about eating healthy is that you start to really pay attention to what everyone around you is eating. My sense of smell is almost as heightened as it was when I was pregnant. The girls at work have been laughing at me the last couple of days because whenever they are eating I'm like...."That smells good!" Ha ha. We usually eat lunch together in a little room and they were all eating spaghetti, chicken fried rice and meatloaf today. Dude. It smelled so good in that room. My lunch was tasty, but not spaghetti, chicken fried rice or meatloaf. Jason came in to give me a kiss and he had just eaten a Zone bar - all I could smell was coconut. What has really gotten me through the temptation is that I am already down a few pounds (I won't say how much yet) and that's kept me on point.

So I'm officially at the point that is usually my undoing when it comes to eating well...the weekend. It's easy at work, I'm on a schedule, I pack my lunch, plan it out...the weekends are a little harder. I struggle to get all of my water in, I have to fight the snack monster, I don't want to cook...yada yada. The kid keeps me busy, which helps, but it's still tough. So to mitigate some of the risk (I obviously work at a bank) I did a few things: made my grocery list tonight so that I can hit the grocery store early tomorrow and stock back up and made sure I had enough for a good breakfast in the morning. The trick will be drinking enough water! My offiial weigh in is on Monday, so I need to keep that in my mind all weekend.

Day 3 - This one hurt a little.

See that picture? It will be the death of me. One of our loan officers sent us a big batch of homemade Easter candy this morning and then my manager went out at lunch and bought a big bowl of candy. I appreciate the thank yous, but DAMN, really? It was tough to walk past that table all day. However, instead of Easter candy, I broke down and had a Diet Dr. Pepper. I figure that it's the lesser of the evils. It was delicious and I'm going to pretend it tastes way better than any of that chocolate on the table. Ha ha! Hopefully tomorrow I can avoid the table altogether - must find more work to keep me at my desk and out of the back area.

Besides the candy, today was the toughest so far. The last 2 days weren't that bad - but today, I could feel the difference. Got a little sketchy toward the end of the day, but I toughed it out. My calorie intake was good, I can just tell that the big decrease in sugar and carbs (not a total elimination, but a big dip in my norm) is changing my energy levels. It will get better, I just have to get through the first week. Once the first 17 day cycle is over, I get to add back some complex carbs in the second cycle. I'm looking forward to oatmeal again!

ABC's - Getting to Know Me?

Something a lot of my favorite bloggers are doing today, so I thought I'd join in the fun:


A. Age: 31 (less than 2 months away from 32)
B. Bed size: Queen. It's not enough.
C. Chore you hate: Cleaning the litter box...and I don't do it. Thanks honey!
D. Dogs: 1, Buddy
E. Essential start to your day: Snuggles with the Monkey while he has his first bottle.
F. Favorite color: Right now? Black. Very slimming.
G. Gold or silver: Silver
H. Height: 5’7
I. Instruments: Zero.
J. Job title: SBA Closing/Funding Team Lead
K. Kids: Gage, 8 months
L. Live: Dallas
M. Mom’s name: Cyndi
N. Nicknames: T (not sure if they count, but I go by either Baby or Mama...or BabyMama around my house)
O. Overnight hospital stays: Only one was for the kiddo's arrival...well and I believe I was in the hospital for an illness when I was a baby.
P. Pet peeve: Smacking while eating
Q. Quote from a movie: Waiter, there is too much pepper in my paprikash, but I would be proud to partake in your pecan pie.
R. Right or left handed: Right
S. Siblings: 1 brother, Brad
T. Time you wake up: Excluding any wake ups for the kiddo, I start my day around 6:30a
U. Underwear: Hanes Hipsters, available at Target in a 6 pack
V. Vegetables you dislike: asparagus, eggplant
W. What makes you run late: I never give myself enough time to get ready.
X. X-Rays you’ve had: weird question. chest, head, arm, ankle, teeth
Y. Yummy food you make: spicy coconut shrimp with lime jasmine rice (yep, it's just as good as it sounds.)
Z. Zoo- favorite animal: My favorites at the zoo are the penguins and polar bears. Cold weather animals are cute.

Day 2

Day 2. Done. Breakfast and snacks were the same - I had leftover taco salad for lunch and Jason grilled chicken breasts for dinner (served with green beans). Today was a little easier - I wasn't nearly as hungry when I got home from work, which is helpful since I don't get to start dinner right away.
Here's what I didn't say yesterday: I haven't had a diet soda (#1 choice: Diet Dr. Pepper) in almost 48 hours. That is pretty amazing for me. The plan doesn't say I have to give up diet soda (regular soda is a no-no), but my intake has steadily increased since the baby was born. I used to limit myself to 1-2 cans a day, but when I started losing sleep I would drink it to pep myself up and before I knew it I would be drinking 4-5 a day - WAY more than I want to drink. So for now I'm putting it down. It's hard because it's an easy sweet fix and I LOVE bubbles. LOL. It's also helping me get my water intake - if I'm not drinking soda, then I'm drinking water. Better for me.
Today the kiddo and I took a little walk around the neighborhood. I was testing my ankle a little bit just to see how it's feeling. Crazy thing is that my right ankle feels much better, but now my achilles on my left ankle is tender. I think the final verdict is that I tried to do too much, too fast in the Vibrams. Everyone warned me..."Go Slow!" "Be easy!"...but you know me, 90 to nothing at all times. So for now, back to walking for a while until I feel really comfortable picking up the pace a bit. Slow and steady, even if it's really annoying. There are all these races I want to do, but I having trouble getting up and going. I know I can walk them, but I just really miss running. I'm hoping that if I can lose some of the weight with just walking and the diet, the running might get easier. It's tough to carry this extra weight and I don't want to ruin my knees and/or ankles trying to overdo it.
Today's Temptation: Peanut M&M's. We were testing some programs at work today and my coworker was sitting next to me eating some. OMG. They smelled so good, but I did NOT eat any. Victory!

Day 1

Ok...today was Day 1 of the new eating plan. It wasn't too bad - although I did get a little hungry before dinner. My meals looked like this: Bfast: Scrambled eggs (1 whole, 2 whites) with salsa, 1 cup of blackberries, green tea Morning Snack: Low Fat strawberry Chobani yogurt Lunch: Grilled chicken breast with green beans Afternoon Snack: honeycrisp apple Dinner: Taco Salad (lettuce, tomato, ground turkey cooked with chiles and taco seasoning, salsa and a little reduced fat cheddar) Since I am a BIG proponent of making life easy, this will be pretty much my menu for the rest of the week. I will probably take the rest of the taco salad tomorrow for lunch and then cook up some chicken breasts for the next couple of lunches and dinners. The rest will be almost exactly the same. I'll switch it up next week to keep it interesting. It's just easier (and cheaper) to keep it simple and similar during the week. Day 1...done.

Countdown to D-Day

Here's the thing about planning to start a diet on a specific day - in the few days before, I find myself eating all of the things I love because I know that I won't have them again for a long time. So in the last 3 days I've had pizza, burger and fries, Mexican food, doughnuts...it's like my last meal(s). Hopefully I won't end up adding 5 more pounds to what I have to lose. So I've read the book and it's extremely easy to follow - but it will be a big change in the way that I have been eating. I'm looking forward to getting some of my energy back because it is tough to chase after that kiddo with all this extra weight. I've added a counter to the blog to track the progress. I won't say what weight I'm starting at (horrifying!) I will post how much I've lost. AND I took some "before" pictures today, but I am not going to post them until I have some "after" pictures to compare them to. Grocery shopping tomorrow, healthier me on Monday!